Be Buffy

Originally published in the Informanté newspaper on Thursday, 7 December, 2017.


On the 10th of December, we here in Namibia celebrate Human Rights Day, but we also celebrate another day, one that’s sadly overshadowed by it. We also celebrate International Women’s Day. Now, I realise that as a man, I have very little authority to talk about women’s issues, but as Sir Patrick Stewart so eloquently put it, "People won't listen to you or take you seriously unless you're an old white man, and since I'm an old white man I'm going to use that to help the people who need it." I hope I can do a bit better, and have someone else do the talking. Buffy Anne Summers.

Buffy Summers was created as a response to that old writing trope – that of the bubblehead blonde that wandered into the dark alley and got murdered. Buffy was that bubblehead blonde, and she fought back and won. As she taught us, appearances can be deceiving – she might have been blonde, true, and a typical girl, but she was no bubblehead, and she was in no way weaker for being either. For "into every generation a slayer is born: one girl in all the world, a chosen one. She alone will wield the strength and skill to fight the vampires, demons, and the forces of darkness; to stop the spread of their evil and the swell of their number. She is the Slayer."

Because while Buffy the Vampire Slayer seems to be but a simple pop-culture show, it is anything but. It has more academic papers, essays and books written about it than any other media property – at last count, over 200 – and those papers range from gender and family studies to aesthetics. Because while Buffy may appear to have a simple premise, the fights against vampires, demons and the forces of darkness parallels the similar fights most women have growing up – fighting their own vampires, demons and forces arrayed against them. 

Buffy is, in essence, teaching us all how to deal with the absurdity of life. We all seek inherent value and meaning in life, while the universe we inhabit is by its very nature meaningless – the very nature of our existence is thus absurd. How do we deal with it? The way that Buffy shows us – we need to create our own meaning in life, and to live life to the fullest, as it can be snatched from us at any moment. As Buffy tells her sister, “The hardest thing in this world is to live in it. Be brave. Live.”

Buffy teaches us that all we need to be strong is ourselves. No one else. Even when almost defeated, and her former lover taunts her with a sword pointed at her with, “No weapons, no friends, no hope. Take all that away, what's left?” Buffy can respond with, “Me.” Strength is in what you are, not what you’re given, and you should not allow anyone to take it away from you. 

The show also teaches us the power of forgiveness and redemption. Throughout the seven years, we see not only Buffy grow up from a teenage girl to an independent woman, but we see the people around her, and how she deals with them. Just like the real world, her world is not black and white, but rather varying shades of grey. Several characters that could at the start be said to be bad, find redemption, and those that start good turn bad as well. Buffy herself has to learn to forgive those around her, because “To forgive is an act of compassion. It's not done because people deserve it. It's done because they need it.”

Buffy also reminds us of our own empathy, by deliberately invoking a feeling of sonder – i.e. the realization that each random passerby is living a life as vivid and complex as your own — populated with their own ambitions, friends, routines, worries and inherited craziness—an epic story that continues invisibly around you. Or as she put it to Jonathan, “My life happens on occasion to suck beyond the telling of it. Sometimes more than I can handle. And it’s not just mine. Every single person down there is ignoring your pain because they're too busy with their own. The beautiful ones. The popular ones. The guys that pick on you. Everyone.”

But perhaps the greatest gift Buffy gave to all women is her message of agency. Buffy had to fight many demons, both internal and external throughout her struggles, but what she never gives up is her capacity to act. She never gives up. In a world where women are constantly under siege, in a country such as ours with a horrible culture of domestic violence, the one thing no woman should ever forget is that she has the capacity to act – to change the world. Even more powerful than her message against domestic violence (“No man is worth your life. Not ever.”) is her choice to never cede agency. As she puts it, “Strong is fighting. It's hard and it's painful and it's every day. It's what we have to do, and we can do it together.”

So to all the women in Namibia, Buffy only has this to say: “So here's the part where you make a choice. What if you could have that power, now? In every generation, one Slayer is born, because a bunch of men who died thousands of years ago made up that rule. They were powerful men. This woman is more powerful than all of them combined. So I say we change the rule. I say my power should be our power. Every girl who could have the power, will have the power, who can stand up, will stand up. Make your choice. Are you ready to be strong?”

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